[ This hurts him. She knew this would hurt him, and she knows it's only going to hurt him more the further she explains. She still thinks it was better for him to feel this pain than to die with her, or to succumb to the virus with her. He didn't deserve that.
But seeing the pain on his face still tears at her, and the guilt - familiar guilt - swells up inside in spite of her resolve. ]
... I was already dying, Nines.
[ she knew she wasn't going to live, the moment she decided to send him away. The logic virus had infiltrated her system. At the very least, she hadn't wanted him to go down with her - or worse, force him to fight her again. She didn't want him to suffer anymore. 2B dying alone was the best thing that could happen to him - that's what she believed. She still believes it to some extent now; it's only 9S's extraordinary ability to forgive that lets her stand near him in this moment.
But that's why this hurts him, too. Because she'd wanted to die back then, and -- he cares about her. More than he should. Wouldn't it simply be too cruel to tell him that she'd willingly given herself over to A2? What did 9S do, after she was gone? She remembers his desperate joy when they first reunited; she sees him now, strained and upset, and she worries. ]
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But seeing the pain on his face still tears at her, and the guilt - familiar guilt - swells up inside in spite of her resolve. ]
... I was already dying, Nines.
[ she knew she wasn't going to live, the moment she decided to send him away. The logic virus had infiltrated her system. At the very least, she hadn't wanted him to go down with her - or worse, force him to fight her again. She didn't want him to suffer anymore. 2B dying alone was the best thing that could happen to him - that's what she believed. She still believes it to some extent now; it's only 9S's extraordinary ability to forgive that lets her stand near him in this moment.
But that's why this hurts him, too. Because she'd wanted to die back then, and -- he cares about her. More than he should. Wouldn't it simply be too cruel to tell him that she'd willingly given herself over to A2? What did 9S do, after she was gone? She remembers his desperate joy when they first reunited; she sees him now, strained and upset, and she worries. ]
What A2 did... She was showing me mercy.